Query Letter Tips: Don’t Get Ahead of Yourself


By Mary Kole

Mary Kole is a former literary agent, freelance editor, writing teacher, author of Writing Irresistible Kidlit, and IP developer for major publishers, with over a decade in the publishing industry.

As a former literary agent, I want to give you some query letter advice: don’t put the cart before the horse. Unfortunately, we’re fighting human nature here, so this is something I see all the time in the slush pile. Writers come at their queries like snake oil salesmen without a strategy, pitching anything and everything they think might land. This means suggesting that their books are developed into apps, ice shows, movies (of course), theme parks, merchandise, and other tie-ins. Don’t get me wrong, I love it when people dream big, but I don’t think the query letter is the place for this kind of moonshot.

Set Realistic Expectations in Your Query Letter

While there’s nothing wrong with having ambitious plans for your project, it’s important to remember that the primary objective should be getting your book published first.

It’s true that some books do find success beyond the printed page, but these instances are relatively rare, in the grand scheme of things. Most books will sell audio rights, some subrights, maybe foreign rights, and could be optioned for film, but it’s unlikely that some of these more exciting projects will come to fruition. I’m not being a Debbie Downer here. Consider Judy Blume, universally beloved. It took her FIFTY-THREE YEARS from the publication of Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret to get a movie released. If Judy Blume couldn’t hack it for this long, us mere mortals should adjust our expectations.

Most books end up being “just” a book—and that’s more than okay. It seems like the idea of mobile and video game applications has become so popular that many writers approach their query letter with this “and then … and then …” mentality. But for your query letter, less is more. More is not more.

Let me emphasize that not all books are destined for movie options, video game licenses and stuffed animals. Just because you feel you have a great concept does not mean it will automatically be adapted into all of these formats. It’s totally possible for a book to be successful on its own terms. And seriously, the query letter is not the place to vent all of your visions of grandeur.


Curb Your Enthusiasm in Your Query Letter

Watch out, especially, for DEMANDING anything in your query letter, be it the trilogy of books that you require to tell your story (read more about book series here) or a read-and-play app that is pertinent to your premise.

The more you require, especially as a debut writer, the less motivated a literary agent or publisher might be to take a chance on you. Your "and" turns into their "but," i.e., "We definitely spot the potential of this book idea yet they are pushing us for a trilogy and I'm not sure that we can make that type of investment."

A query letter should avoid giving literary agents and editors easy reasons to turn the project down. And seeing that you, as a potential client, have unrealistic expectations is one big reason to reject.

People often wonder what’s wrong with wanting the project to get merchandise and a theme park and a movie—all of those things make money, right? It’s a win-win-win. Yes, but … the premise has to be tried and tested first. Proof of concept must be demonstrated. You’re in a much stronger position if you have fan and publisher demand for these subrights opportunities, rather than demanding them yourself. Again, all of these things happen to people, but the query letter isn’t the place to campaign for them.

query letter

Use Your Query Letter to Be a Professional Delight

Require less, keep your mind open to having a simple and streamlined publishing success story, and you will seem like a down-to-earth delight to gatekeepers. It's usually an exciting and nice surprise when Hollywood calls or a graphic novel edition is offered, so let it be something that happens to you rather than something you try to strongarm into being. But, for maybe the millionth time, this kind of lobbying doesn’t belong in a query letter. Keep things in perspective. Dream big, sure, but leave it out of your query letter.

This post contains affiliate links.

Click here to purchase Successful Query Letters, my book on query letters, including over forty examples with comprehensive notes on each one. There’s a ton of submission advice, best practices, and insider information in these pages, and you’ll really enjoy seeing what other writers are doing in the slush.